tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12472789703206988752024-03-05T09:51:16.902-08:00The Unproductive Zombie SocietyAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-44974204852602371942018-01-30T08:00:00.003-08:002018-01-30T08:00:40.783-08:00ReflectionsHey, guys. It's Chris. Bet you never thought you'd hear from me again. It's...well...it's been a while. Weird how I seem to come back to this every two years. Maybe my next post will be in 2020. Maybe there won't be a next post, and this blog will sink back into the relative obscurity of the old abandoned blog.<br />
<br />
Anyway.<br />
<br />
I've been moving around a lot over the past two years. Who am I kidding, that's a lie. I've been in New Orleans. I like New Orleans. It's big and loud and it doesn't much care if you're a blue undead half demon cursed to forever roam the world in the body of an eight year old. New Orleans is no stranger to the paranormal. I fit right in.<br />
<br />
I think I might leave soon, though. I've been feeling restless lately. But I think I'll stick around for one more Mardi Gras. They like me at Mardi Gras. It's one of the few times my stagnated growth has come in handy. Kids are cute, and consequently are showered in gaudy plastic beads and given the least inappropriate (and arguably the cutest) toys. Call me childish, but I like toys.<br />
<br />
Of course, I'm not actually a kid anymore. I'm twenty now. A full-fledged adult in most countries. Just half a year away from being legally able to drink in this one. Not that any credible seller of alcohol would believe I was. But it's still a milestone. The last barrier on the way to adulthood. It's exciting.<br />
<br />
It's also mind-boggling. Before deciding to write this, I looked back through the archives. My Blogger profile says I'm eighteen. The profile Jace wrote me back at the start of all this says I'm fifteen. It's been five years since I started this blog.<br />
<br />
It's been <i>five</i> <i>years</i> since I started this blog.<br />
<br />
Looking back at my posts from 2012, it's kind of jarring how zany everything feels. Sure we had our struggles, the truly horrifying moments that naturally arise from being a group of undead teenagers, but for the most part it was light-hearted, even whimsical in a gothic, Tim Burton kind of way. I miss that younger me who would wax philosophical about prime numbers or share random pictures he found funny or scare unsuspecting high school students into respecting me and maybe given up smoking. I miss the me who would apologize constantly for missing a week's post because sometimes life just happens, who tried to see everything in an optimistic light, who thought he could control his demonic instincts with a cursory knowledge of basic neurology and a practically cartoonish ability to make gadgets do what he wanted. I miss the me who thought he could help others control their own instincts the same way.<br />
<br />
I miss the me who refused to acknowledge that he was half demon.<br />
<br />
That me is long gone, worn away by two years of wandering and four years of coping with the kind of harsh realities that naturally come out of being half demon for more than half your life. It's astounding how much someone can change in just five years. I suppose that change is part of growing up--the much maligned loss of innocence and slow acquisition of perspective and nuance.<br />
<br />
But more than that, I miss the society. The community it brought. The feeling that I didn't have to go through life alone. I still don't know where any of them are, if any of them are even still around. I probably never will. I've been trying to move on. Build new bridges to replace the ones that burned away in a haze of blood and bad decisions. For the most part, I think it's been working.<br />
<br />
For the most part.<br />
<br />
<br />Last time I resurfaced, I likened my situation to trying to rebuild a house of cards in the midst of a kaleidoscope of giant butterflies. Recently, I've been thinking cards are too flimsy. I'm thinking of switching to gumdrops and toothpicks. I think the resulting structure will be a lot more sound. A lot more prepared to withstand the damage caused by an entire kaleidoscope of butterflies.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPrsh5prhjH8YxXm07ohWOK5PTPucumhiqAZ_lqqa4uVxiBaXflkigYK3hlELPP_64_jE4hyaIwDpIZZtBn2avVo6nJR7ELAKLhbj5qGybG-UqAr3gf3tHfQZ7mZC2XSPx72LcWGwcmRXr/s1600/kaleidoscopeofbutterflies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="234" data-original-width="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPrsh5prhjH8YxXm07ohWOK5PTPucumhiqAZ_lqqa4uVxiBaXflkigYK3hlELPP_64_jE4hyaIwDpIZZtBn2avVo6nJR7ELAKLhbj5qGybG-UqAr3gf3tHfQZ7mZC2XSPx72LcWGwcmRXr/s1600/kaleidoscopeofbutterflies.jpg" /></a></div>
<br />
Did you know a group of butterflies is called a kaleidoscope? I think that's pretty neat.<br />
<br />
Anyway, that's where I'm at right now.<br />
<br />
Will I ever update this blog again? Who knows. Maybe. I'd like to. If only because shouting my thoughts into the void is pretty cathartic. And, if the Blogger stats page is anything to go by, sometimes people even read them. I'm no internet celebrity, but my page-views are shockingly consistent, given the years of inactivity.<br />
<br />
So, yeah. If you've read this far, thank you. I'm glad you think I'm worth paying attention to. Maybe leave a comment if you want? It might be nice. Who knows, I might even respond.<br />
<br />
Until next time, or possibly forever,<br />
ChrisAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-74486831413020853662015-11-05T19:52:00.002-08:002015-11-05T19:52:53.342-08:00Of Rampages and Demons and StuffFor anyone who hasn't read my posts from 2012, I became a zombie on Halloween 2005 in a necromantic ritual performed by what I can only assume was a group of very drunk college students. I have never elaborated on this, because I was trying to keep the site's content light, and quite frankly it's kind of an uncomfortable subject for me.<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
That said, the nature of my zombification has shaped my life and personality to date. I'm smarter and faster than the classic shambling, Romero-esque zombie...and also technically part demon.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
No, really.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Now, for the most part, my demon-half is pretty dormant. As long as I keep my temper in check, my inner demon stays asleep. Unless, of course, it's Halloween. Then it goes insane.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7C7Cf2VSNHPxLUySHEiWRgupduaZgVJE3KqYyagRgwbWngtqgmTyuYxakvEy_PYNBSnnAHI5BrnwHU9KLGR_bndw-p0k1EIudmm4nzZrlAm9fkN8Q9AF8QfpSf_Q-TzG8Ur6CWeVp0_1f/s1600/pumpkins.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="226" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7C7Cf2VSNHPxLUySHEiWRgupduaZgVJE3KqYyagRgwbWngtqgmTyuYxakvEy_PYNBSnnAHI5BrnwHU9KLGR_bndw-p0k1EIudmm4nzZrlAm9fkN8Q9AF8QfpSf_Q-TzG8Ur6CWeVp0_1f/s320/pumpkins.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Demons hate pumpkins.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />I'm not sure if it's the inherent nature of the day, or just because it's the day I died, but I turn into a bloodthirsty monster on Halloween. And I hate it. I hate not being in control. I hate that I might seriously injure or kill people close to me, and I hate that there's nothing I can do to stop it.<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Normally, I try to avoid rampaging by trapping myself in a cage in a basement or something, and it worked for a while. But when I was making the preparations to lock myself away this year, I thought, why bother? I hardly know any of the people in this town, and it's not like any of them actually like me or even trust me anyway, so would it really hurt if I let myself rampage for a night? And I did and I killed I don't know how many people and I skipped town the next morning and what scares me is I think I'm losing touch with humanity and I don't want to become a monster.....I can't become a monster..........</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSrTef1MD-HFLfETlxty7H0TvO5vzjlHNj0oDAZlhsV041pRodHcQOp0OP82RGmkuUzhCjEzlVgElKP6GhS4BhvE71AmmbdXhFxwjGVIgMo5FPpTVhLEqoWVuy1Z_6-BNQtF3boN8WBlvX/s1600/little-kitty-in-a-little-box.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSrTef1MD-HFLfETlxty7H0TvO5vzjlHNj0oDAZlhsV041pRodHcQOp0OP82RGmkuUzhCjEzlVgElKP6GhS4BhvE71AmmbdXhFxwjGVIgMo5FPpTVhLEqoWVuy1Z_6-BNQtF3boN8WBlvX/s320/little-kitty-in-a-little-box.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">To distract from that mental breakdown,<br />here's a cat in a box! </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So yeah, I moved. This new town's pretty nice, but who knows how long I'll be here. There's been some speculation about whether I'm in college now, and the answer is no, I'm not. Since the incident, I've been moving around a lot, but I haven't settled down for long enough to even think about college, and to be honest, I don't really have any plans for the foreseeable future. Who knows, maybe I'll adopt a kitten.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
From the wrong side of sanity,</div>
<div>
Chris</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-15149380159267351622015-10-04T22:31:00.001-07:002015-10-04T22:34:04.348-07:00Curiosity killed the Martians (Probably)So, I know I'm about a week late to this topic, but GUYS THERE'S WATER ON MARS! Recently, NASA discovered certain hydrated salts, which can only be detected for a short time after water has been present in a certain area. These basically confirm that a whole bunch of dark streaks (called recurring slope linage) on the planet's surface were, in fact, probably created by water. Anyone who wants to read about the science in more detail, can do so <a href="https://www.nasa.gov/press-release/nasa-confirms-evidence-that-liquid-water-flows-on-today-s-mars">here</a>.<br />
<br />
Naturally, this has a number of implications, including the idea that a manned journey to Mars has suddenly become a lot more feasible.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZu9OsEkKLHTUIdAoRLd2uSWgTliBWXRN2MvSV5KIwEKpTGqXkp6WONDZF3BoSDWS3lDCVMGPINrChDL5HothVWIccHxxl3Srjqdbe0OzYY07IZTtl8x0RBVfPtHmR5sPhMzgyrwIMTmax/s1600/Tardigrade-Dont-Give-A-S-t.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="" border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZu9OsEkKLHTUIdAoRLd2uSWgTliBWXRN2MvSV5KIwEKpTGqXkp6WONDZF3BoSDWS3lDCVMGPINrChDL5HothVWIccHxxl3Srjqdbe0OzYY07IZTtl8x0RBVfPtHmR5sPhMzgyrwIMTmax/s320/Tardigrade-Dont-Give-A-S-t.jpg" title="" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Little do they know, the tardigrades colonized Mars<br />
thousands of years before humans even existed.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
What really interested me, though, was that this proves that there is very probably microbial life on Mars. Either that or some form of life we can't even begin to comprehend. Although none of the news articles I read seemed to consider that second possibility, which I think is a major oversight on their part.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Either way, the probable existence of life on Mars means aliens in general probably exist, and proof of the existence of aliens will probably settle, once and for all, whether or not we are alone in the universe. You know, probably.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Also, due to the probable existence of life on Mars, certain Mars rovers, like Curiosity, have been forbidden from going near the water deposits. Apparently, a treaty (aptly named the "Outer Space Treaty") exists between all Earth nations forbidding anyone to send a robot to an extraterrestrial water deposit without first irradiating it to the point of uselessness (to kill any potentially harmful Earth bugs).</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirQWp5WV6pcnNlEFTHIUd39ET09kEXE5ymYsR7n371UbHl-FwRYGb7owwucf72hnKuUgTSA52uDZ8wAcPV5q30Ri_WLsjCJiw4Sd_UFqs4Tux10_kvChGMz1XPq1KDWPeN1JsAnyGt93pB/s1600/pia16239_c-hpfeat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirQWp5WV6pcnNlEFTHIUd39ET09kEXE5ymYsR7n371UbHl-FwRYGb7owwucf72hnKuUgTSA52uDZ8wAcPV5q30Ri_WLsjCJiw4Sd_UFqs4Tux10_kvChGMz1XPq1KDWPeN1JsAnyGt93pB/s320/pia16239_c-hpfeat.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is, of course, assuming that Curiosity isn't<br />
already covered in invisible Martian moss.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, despite how funny it may be to picture Curiosity lumbering, Wall-E style, over Martian terrain for a year, just to confirm something we probably already know, it's probably for the best if the robots stay sufficiently far away from any Martian rivers. Probably.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And, although I personally find the idea that water is essential to the survival of all life a bit restricting, it is the best lead we have in the quest for extraterrestrials, so we might as well follow it.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Until next time, from beyond the stars,</div>
<div>
Chris</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-58547041999410763002015-10-01T20:07:00.000-07:002015-10-02T10:41:55.141-07:00EntropyEntropy is defined as a lack of order or predictability, or the natural inclination for things to fall into chaos. In less wordy words, it means things change, usually by way of total societal collapse, in the most melodramatic fashion possible. Or, failing that, by a convoluted mixture of laziness, random chance, and luck, with the occasional dash of poetic justice thrown in for laughs. I like entropy because it's a soft pretty word meant to describe a generally loud, unpleasant topic. It defines change as a giant butterfly knocking down a house of cards.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic5DAWf9Ebi7mycZhxQBKTA5e0GpA1jq8ExUMzaDGbkhKTCRgG3OPPKF6SBsHt9PCrQaThzHvEF7mqyRFrIRBDuS3IURXVLI72TRbIT68c5Bc84SZf0c6g73yfQguCNqkHLIK_q0EyfVV6/s1600/47303f78-4837-48a9-80b1-46120d4fb30b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic5DAWf9Ebi7mycZhxQBKTA5e0GpA1jq8ExUMzaDGbkhKTCRgG3OPPKF6SBsHt9PCrQaThzHvEF7mqyRFrIRBDuS3IURXVLI72TRbIT68c5Bc84SZf0c6g73yfQguCNqkHLIK_q0EyfVV6/s320/47303f78-4837-48a9-80b1-46120d4fb30b.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The butterfly effect is real. Fear it.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div>
I recently realized that I have not updated this blog in the past two years, which is contrary to my original goal of spreading zombie awareness, which would probably require posting slightly more often than never. Honestly, I've been meaning to get around to it, but it turns out you process time a little differently when you realize <i>you</i> are never going to change. Ever. No matter how many giant butterflies are fluttering around you. Time sure flies when you're undead.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
That being said, my house of cards was by no means immune to the hypothetical swarm of giant butterflies. Prior to my last post in 2013, things were looking up. I mean, no major disasters had happened since Christmas, and the most I was worrying about was making it through my senior year of high school. Unfortunately, we were ambushed by a group of zombie hunters shortly afterward. The actual attack and ensuing weeks are a complete blank for me. I have absolutely no idea what happened. I do know that about a month later I woke up covered in blood in an abandoned warehouse two states away.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Naturally, I immediately returned to our house, only to discover that it had been burned to the ground. Since then, I've been wandering, just trying to stay out of trouble. I have no idea where any of the other members of the society are, or even if they're still alive. Honestly, it's probably better that way. Like it or not, large groups of zombies are dangerous, even if they are friendly.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkcNW_oq3Ai1u1me-bcGPqaoldnDT8AWpzQ60w6QYvARhROuWf2srNtvwv4KboK09SEvkUNNew-hwpLmNRbJQGrD5hf8ZJilIO6WndLX8iOQNFCPFm0CUath0Of_EBo6nM48zV9ixSbIjg/s1600/fallenhouseofcards.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="255" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkcNW_oq3Ai1u1me-bcGPqaoldnDT8AWpzQ60w6QYvARhROuWf2srNtvwv4KboK09SEvkUNNew-hwpLmNRbJQGrD5hf8ZJilIO6WndLX8iOQNFCPFm0CUath0Of_EBo6nM48zV9ixSbIjg/s320/fallenhouseofcards.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Stupid giant butterflies</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
......................WOW that was depressing. Also weird. And disjointed. I apologize.<br />
<br />
Anyway, in recent months, I've been trying to pull my unlife back together, and I wanted to continue the blog. When I started this blog, I wanted to post at least once a week. Now, I look back on my younger self and scoff. I'll try to update regularly, but I'm not one for keeping schedules. If you like what I write, great! But I'm rebuilding a very large house of cards, and giant butterflies are not known for their negotiation skills.......</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
With love and brains,</div>
<div>
Chris</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-91185042044912428392013-07-03T21:23:00.000-07:002013-07-03T21:23:10.639-07:00MetamorphosisSo, apparently today is Franz Kafka's birthday. For anyone who doesn't know, he's the guy who wrote <em>Metamorphosis </em>(the one where the guy turns into a dung beetle), which I've recently had to read for summer English homework.<br />
Honestly, I like the Google doodle better than the actual book.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-36005532812618966772013-06-04T19:51:00.001-07:002013-06-04T19:51:29.271-07:00UPDATES!!!!*pokes head around corner*<br />
Um...sorry I haven't posted in over two months.....I've been super busy....with finals and AP tests and stuff......please don't kill me!<br />
But, a lot of stuff happened during my radio silence.<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>I was going to do an Easter post, but Jim's old friend - sorry,<i> acquaintance</i> - Edward showed up and decided to crash for a while. And, while Ed is, in all fairness, a pretty cool guy, he tends to disregard human life a little more than we'd like, so we try to keep him under close watch when he's in town. Fortunately, his two week visit passed without major incident.</li>
<li>Cherri's and Robert's birthdays happened! Yay!</li>
<li>My birthday's tomorrow! Yay!</li>
<li>Jace successfully graduated high school! Yay!</li>
<li>Jess tricked Jace into eating a piece of turkey about a month ago. He got really upset, but he's back to his usual, vegetarian self.</li>
<li>Last week, I started working on a way to reduce the size of the visors to compensate for Robert's glasses. I'm still in the planning stages, but with any luck I'll have results before the new school year starts in August.</li>
</ul>
And that...brings you up to date. I'll try not to stay dormant for too long any more....<ul>
</ul>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-14391210340239288762013-03-29T13:32:00.001-07:002013-03-29T13:32:08.706-07:00Life Lesson LearnedContrary to popular belief, the laws of physics apply to electric mixers. In other words, if your mixers are covered in cake batter and you turn them on, cake batter will go flying everywhere.....Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-53198296999644869432013-02-20T19:20:00.001-08:002013-02-20T19:20:06.376-08:00True StoryWe broke into the theatre teacher's office with the principal's keys.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-73497198081057610642013-02-14T15:13:00.000-08:002013-02-14T15:13:18.272-08:00Love Conquers AllSooooooooooo, it's been a while. There was a little bit of a rough period there (Alien is freaking INSANE), but we got things sorted out. And we're back! Just in time for Valentine's Day. Aren't we lucky.<br />
Valentine's has many names, including Single's Awareness Day, Forever Alone Day, and my personal favorite, I Hate Red And Pink Day. Notice how only one of those has a positive connotation? That's because, if you're single, Valentine's Day is a REALLY sucky holiday. But today, I get to tell a happy story.<br />
So it turns out Robert, one of the new zombies, has a crush on one of the people he used to work with. You know, one of those silent, not-quite-stalker relationships. Well, turns out, dying sort of triggered something in his brain, and he decided to declare his undying love for her. Today.<br />
I know, a lot of you are already thinking this is going to end badly, but remember, this is a happy story. So Robert, who isn't allowed out of any of our sights, somehow managed to sneak away, purchase a small stuffed rabbit, walk straight into the office building where she works, and present it to her. By the time we found him, they were making plans for a date. Next week.<br />
Turns out, she had felt the same about him for the past few years. And she didn't give a damn about his current dead state. Which just made it extra sweet for Robert.<br />
So I guess love really does conquer all. Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-57232528356091158112013-01-24T19:50:00.002-08:002013-01-24T19:50:37.290-08:00Happy thoughtsHey Lea,<br />
I know you're in a funk right now, and I know you're probably still really super mad at me, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry, you know, in front of the world. It'll get better, I promise. I'll bring you chocolate. I hear chocolate makes people feel better, so just say the word, and there will be chocolate. I promise.<br />
Very really and truly sincerly,<br />
ChrisAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-50086853550603859782013-01-16T07:36:00.001-08:002013-01-16T07:36:10.255-08:00Jace: UpdatesSo, things have been happening, and I figure you all need some updates as to what we've been doing.<br />
<ul>
<li>There are two new zombies in the society. We're learning about them and we'll have bios up eventually.</li>
<li>We brought Xander flowers in the hospital. He was thrilled.</li>
<li>Lea was true to her word and has thoroughly killed Chris. I managed to get away and have been avoiding her for the past week. This is also why I'm the one posting this, because Chris is still recuperating.</li>
<li>Finally, the site will be changing. Be aware.</li>
</ul>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-66311362815540090462012-12-22T12:25:00.002-08:002013-01-15T12:16:45.338-08:00The End of the World as we Know It (Or Not)So, obviously, since we're all still here, the world did not end yesterday. Shocker. However, yesterday was quite the adventure for the society.<br />
So, I was sitting in class, waiting for school to get out (yes, the last day of the semester was indeed yesterday) when a feral zombie (one that doesn't have control over it's actions) came shambling into the room. So, I knocked him out, then grabbed an extra visor (never leave home without one) and clamped it over his ear. No sooner had that little episode finished, than I got a call from Dragon, who said, very plainly, "ZOMBIES!!!!" In other words, there were more, and we wouldn't be able to save most of them.<br />
There was a lot of fighting after that, as we tried to save the town. If this comes as a surprise to you, it shouldn't. See, we're funded by the government, and if they die, we're cut off. Also, I actually like most of the people who live here. Some notable events:<br />
<ol>
<li>We saved comment Lea from a zombie orthodontist right when he was about to tear into her skull.</li>
<li>When we realized it was Lea he was trying to eat, we proceeded to run away, because she's terrified of zombies and I worked really hard getting her to accept me. I have a feeling that's going to come back to haunt me later.</li>
<li>Jess and Cherri ran into that Xander guy and started viciously attacking him. When asked to justify this, they started ranting about how much of a jerk he was and that he deserved worse. I really can't say I blame them, but he was doing a pretty good job containing the problem.</li>
<li>Jace caught them in the act, saved his life, and "set phasers to stun." In other words, he hit him on the back of the head with a gun, and dragged him into a nearby hospital.</li>
<li>Fun fact: a zombified cat is way harder to kill than a regular zombie. You have to shoot it eight times before it finally stops moving.</li>
<li>Eventually, the guy from the beginning woke up and had a nervous breakdown. Apparently his name's Robert and he was the first victim. He did, however, give a pretty good description of the culprit. All this happened in front of my friend Myra, who then texted me the info.</li>
<li>We eventually found the culprit hiding in the ally behind a major tech company. Her name's Alien (as far as we can tell) and she's a ditzy little girl who apparently forgot she was a zombie before biting one of the employees in the arm.</li>
</ol>
So the zombie outbreak was successfully subdued and we have two new members. Robert Thomas has replaced Jace as the new guy, something Jace is very proud of. Alien Cooper is actually 35 years old, was zombified at age nine, and is exactly one inch shorter than me, something I am very proud of. Also, it was Dragon's birthday yesterday. She's 18 now, and the universe gave her a miniature apocalypse. Happy birthday, Dragon.<br />
In other news, it turns out the calender in the oreo cookie joke from before the apocalypse is actually the Aztec calender. So, I did a little research, and this is what the Mayan calender actually looks like:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA6ypUq4_JkMnvQkOoCsEukSwcHN2vGFFESUlgPhC6knd7bEAahpQoVq4D4wSSemqCZN2m4MPnhUxFVPJGgrlW4GbMQgsqckp3Kjzi7JMNc4-J7D3R9Gju1nX-K-y3hGfZt_K79LRut6cO/s1600/mayan-calendar1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="228" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA6ypUq4_JkMnvQkOoCsEukSwcHN2vGFFESUlgPhC6knd7bEAahpQoVq4D4wSSemqCZN2m4MPnhUxFVPJGgrlW4GbMQgsqckp3Kjzi7JMNc4-J7D3R9Gju1nX-K-y3hGfZt_K79LRut6cO/s320/mayan-calendar1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Aaaaaaaaaand that's about it, Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Happy Kwanza, Happy Festivus, etc. Until next year!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-43912318212339307532012-12-19T14:57:00.002-08:002012-12-19T14:57:41.471-08:00End of the World?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmnRBlQCJifswup0LXfCDQ1DQa3YA9cYOordObovFXXHHQrSREChByM2UE_r1dZeWw3pMZxUqagyQ310-sMChqSVV6ukHM7Hs9nYDhjRftMGwQT366P3dGZY_3K4smIVeNNmXKbabXF1xH/s1600/oreos.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="276" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmnRBlQCJifswup0LXfCDQ1DQa3YA9cYOordObovFXXHHQrSREChByM2UE_r1dZeWw3pMZxUqagyQ310-sMChqSVV6ukHM7Hs9nYDhjRftMGwQT366P3dGZY_3K4smIVeNNmXKbabXF1xH/s400/oreos.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
I'm gonna have to agree with the Oreo on this one.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-18679947699337683722012-12-07T13:01:00.000-08:002012-12-07T13:01:41.384-08:00Life and PenguinsYeah, so, a lot of minor things have been happening lately.<br />
First, Dragon decided she had ESP a couple weeks ago. There was a really long conversation to follow, but it all boils down to the idea that esp is not extra sensory perception but really elastically steamed penguins. Yeah, we're not sure how this came about either, but it's funny.<br />
Second, I'm in this club called MESA (that's Mathematics, Engineering, Science, and Achievement). Anyway, there was a competition last weekend where we had to essentiallybuild a car and make it run on a flat surface. And my team, consisting of me, Jace, Joellen, and Lea (yes, comment Lea) got first place. YAY!! I might post a picture of the girls and our car.....eventually.....but it's really exciting.<br />
Third, I learned how to solve a rubick's cube.<br />
Fourth, and probably most important, is this. If you read the comments section, you probably know that there's this guy, Xander Johnson, who has been posting some pretty nasty things on my blog. Well, it turns out he's an old friend of Jace's. It also turns out that he's a zombie hunter. Jace is really sorry for bringing him into this. But, Xander Johnson, know that if you even try to bring this group down, or hurt us in any way, we will end you. We havn't done anything wrong, we just happen to be dead. Not a crime, especially when we're trying to better ourselves. Got it?<br />
Fifth, schoolwork is hell, which is why I havn't posted since Thanksgiving. Which was delicious. I'll try to be better in the future.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-37652005529823260172012-11-19T22:44:00.001-08:002012-11-19T22:44:45.462-08:00ThanksgivingAs many of you may know, there is a very important holiday coming up. Thanksgiving is a very important time of the year. It is a day we celebrate what we have and are grateful for having it. Of course, it's also a day we eat food. Lots of food. Did you know that Americans consume roughly 46 million turkeys a year on Thanksgiving? That's a scary stat, especially if you're a turkey.<br />
Now, as zombies, we don't really stress the Thanksgiving feast, and a lot of the people we know are grateful for that. However, we do understand what Thanksgiving is all about, and we take the time to be thankful that we are still on this earth, have all of our original limbs, have higher brain functions that work, and most importantly, haven't had any death (or is it undeath?) threats in a long time. And that's something to cherish.<br />
Happy Turkey Day, America!! And, for those of you not in America, happy third Thursday in November!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-3977275142704956182012-11-18T08:12:00.000-08:002012-11-18T08:12:01.743-08:00On a Much Happier Note....Jace has just reentered the technology world!! He has taken the initiative and set up an e-mail address. This is a step in the right direction on his part, because it means he's not only successfully adjusting to life as a zombie, but taking the initiative to be an active part of the world. ......or something like that. Anyway, it's really cool, and he deserves congratulation. His new address is secondzombitwin@gmail.com.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-63372104864190697362012-11-17T16:01:00.000-08:002012-11-17T16:18:25.017-08:00Afterlife and Forgiveness and StuffHey, um....so I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. It's been a pretty stressful month for the Society.<br />
So, I was really mad at Jace for posting about my dark side on Halloween. So mad....I sorta went right back into demon mode and tried to eat his face. But, Jace has been pretty stressed lately, with school and refusing to eat because he's a vegetarian, and I guess he just.....snapped. He lost it and started attacking me back. Dragon and Jess had to pull us apart and lock us away until we calmed down. Yeah...neither of us are proud of that.......<br />
Anyway, this set off a red flag for Jim. We had always assumed that Jace was a shambler, meaning he shouldn't have been able to summon the energy to hit me, let alone go all ragey on my demon and fight back. Also, his eyes turned red last week, which is never a good sign.<br />
For those of you who don't know, there are three basic types of zombies. The most common is the shambler, which is your common slow, unenergetic zombie. Alone, shamblers are actually pretty harmless, but they can be really scary in large groups. Jim's a perfect example of a shambler.<br />
There's also the rage zombie. There are a variety of strands of rage zombies, but they are always pumped with adrenaline and way too energetic for their own good. As you may have already guessed, Jess and Dragon are rage zombies.<br />
The third type is the necromatic zombie. That's me. Necromatic zombies are created by using a human sacrifice to summon a demon. The demon comes, possesses the sacrifice, and usually eats it's creator. The sacrifice's soul is left to watch the carnage the demon causes, but there is nothing it can do anything about. I'm lucky, because I managed to retain control of my own body most of the time. Both necromatic and rage zombies are really damn scary.<br />
So, Jim ran a few tests, and it turns out that Jace something called a "dormant-rage" zombie. That means that he acts like a shambler most of the time, but he becomes a high energy rage zombie whenever he's in danger or rrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyy mad. Like, more mad than I have to be to lose it, which is saying something.<br />
I wouldn't have told you this, but I realized something. I made this blog on the concept of acceptance, and it's foolish to accept something if you don't have a relatively thorough knowledge of it. And that means you need to know that the zombie society isn't exactly as harmless as I've tried to make us out to be. So, yeah. I forgave Jace for Halloween's post, and I'll try to be more open with you from now on. Until next time!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-26838397312526341002012-10-31T18:06:00.000-07:002012-10-31T18:06:32.173-07:00Jace: Attack of the Christopher DemonsHey! Chris can't update today, but I thought you would want a Halloween post, as zombies are a really big part of Halloween, so I took it upon myself to post something for you. Yeah, this is Jace.<br />
<br />
As it turns out, when Chris says he was killed in an unholy ritual, he means that he was sacrificed and his body was taken by an unholy demon from hell, or something like that. Yeah, it surprised me too. <br />
<br />
Anyway, Chris apparently made a pact with his demon so he's in control most of the time. Thing is, the demon comes out whenever he gets really upset, and every year on the day he died. Which is Halloween. So Chris is scarier than Dragon now and chained in a locked vault with so many drugs pumped into him that he's higher than most stoners. And there's, like, a billion fire extinguishers outside it.<br />
<br />
So Chris is entirely justified for hating Halloween. In other news, the haunted house is epic and Jess and Dragon have scared about five hundred kids now. I think they're having fun.<br />
<br />
And, that's it! Happy Halloween everyone!!!!!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-74385521980221008362012-10-25T12:49:00.002-07:002012-10-25T12:49:25.479-07:00The Scariest Night of the YearAs you all know (or at least, all of you in the United States) Halloween is less than a week away. Now, many of you may be thinking that this is the biggest night of the year for the Zombie Society. Many of you also may be surprised to hear that it's not actually that big of a deal. The main attraction is Dragon's scared children record. She tries to beat her record for scaring little kids every year. Her current record is 500.<br />
That said, it should be pointed out that this will be Jess and Jace's first Halloween as zombies. They are planning a haunted house, and have been planning or putting up decorations all the time, except when Jace is in school. Apparently they do this every year, but they're putting a lot more work in this year. It should be fun.<br />
As for me, I don't really like Halloween. It has a lot to do with the fact that that was the day I died. It seems pretty intuitive that that would ruin the night for the rest of my life (or afterlife).Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-27098744984292768012012-10-15T15:05:00.000-07:002012-10-15T15:05:04.882-07:00Broken FingersI broke my finger today. In history class. But that's ok, my friends and I fixed it with Elmer's glue and a purple ribbon.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's a picture:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiku9pj7utvjfRZZW9LnJGS38l5QVW0YZgpmtxirTeNxuqn9gtZxvN8fDxNNHpXTLwSpy8gTAyy4KMKanqu-Ue4uTW9EuYP6W7oVzUO0SKr1l1TSjaUhY1Qx91ElUZEHpzGYogcGBO9rbKk/s1600/Photo0194.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiku9pj7utvjfRZZW9LnJGS38l5QVW0YZgpmtxirTeNxuqn9gtZxvN8fDxNNHpXTLwSpy8gTAyy4KMKanqu-Ue4uTW9EuYP6W7oVzUO0SKr1l1TSjaUhY1Qx91ElUZEHpzGYogcGBO9rbKk/s400/Photo0194.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
See, all better^^.<br />
Alright, show of hands, who thought I broke my actual finger? If you did, then my mission is fulfilled.<br />
Now, some of you are probably wondering about my last post. Why would a zombie choose unicorns? Well, when you think about it logically, zombies are dead people who add you to their ranks if they bite you, and actually really scary in large groups. They're often said to bring about the apocalypse. Unicorns, on the other hand, are magical horses with sharp pointy horns sticking out of their heads and amazing healing abilities. If a zombie got in a fight with a unicorn, there is no way the zombie could win. The unicorn would just keep healing itself, giving it enough time to thoroughly impale the zombie if it so desired.<br />
That said, I try to stay away from unicorns.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-19308601889989427292012-10-05T19:29:00.000-07:002012-10-05T19:29:09.458-07:00Zombies vs. UnicornsUnicorns. Duh.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-48622706559299306802012-09-25T17:54:00.001-07:002012-09-25T17:56:18.192-07:00I heart Dead People<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHAC5vfNjOTLDEGzYHluj3gtIFTF51VQtULnLA9v2O_1hE4ZZ0SLD4iAoYF2wbuzWcfHCEtuSnVDCaAce27goYLdAUqZKfCVJIFHj-RrBXKPVS3miDTTOPh7yNujeX2t6rOypCilhMnVhp/s1600/zombies+and+necrophiles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHAC5vfNjOTLDEGzYHluj3gtIFTF51VQtULnLA9v2O_1hE4ZZ0SLD4iAoYF2wbuzWcfHCEtuSnVDCaAce27goYLdAUqZKfCVJIFHj-RrBXKPVS3miDTTOPh7yNujeX2t6rOypCilhMnVhp/s400/zombies+and+necrophiles.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
I think we can all agree that necrophiliacs are freakin' scary.<br />
Also, apparently you can't do a <3 in the post title. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-72379078800570274092012-09-24T18:40:00.001-07:002012-09-24T18:40:54.745-07:00Smoky Smoking SmokersSometimes I like to go up to teen smokers and tell them I died of lung cancer caused by second hand smoke. Then I calmly stroll away. Most of those smokers are scared of me and/or have now stopped smoking.<br />
<br />
Just to clear something up, I didn't actually die of lung cancer. I died in a demonic ritual which I don't really like to talk about. I know this seems like a really horrible thing to do, but it is helping to make our city a better place. Not to mention save lives. Smoking in high school is not a smart decision. It shrivels and blackens your lungs and shortens your life span. It also makes you really depressed. High school's stressful enough without a heap of depressing drugs. That's also why you shouldn't drink. Just throwing that out there.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-9484045725281871862012-09-18T18:59:00.001-07:002012-09-18T18:59:26.005-07:00Cat's out of the BagCherri recently discovered the internet, and she asked me to post this....<br />
<a href="http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/09/14/stowaway-cat-survives-plane-ride-in-suitcase/">http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/09/14/stowaway-cat-survives-plane-ride-in-suitcase/</a><br />
It is actually pretty awesome.<br />
........<br />
Yep.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1247278970320698875.post-77722151868083492782012-09-11T19:38:00.001-07:002012-09-11T19:38:23.808-07:00Today in History9/11 is a very important date for Americans. It is the day the twin towers fell. It raised awareness of the threat of terrorism. It also showed just how much people will do for their cause. Not only were the terrorists willing to die just to crash into the twin towers and the pentagon, but there was one plane that the passengers hijacked from the terrorists who hijacked it in the first place, and got it to crash into an empty field instead. Never forget those people, those are the real heroes of the day, in my opinion.<br />
With that in mind, I'd like to say that today there was a memorial assembly for 9/11 hosted by the JROTC at my high school. Unfortunately, I didn't get to go because it was during second period, and I had a chemistry test. So what I want to know is, why is it that the pep assemblies are mandatory, but the memorials and other JROTC hosted events, which seem to be far more important, are optional? Something to think about.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01857204469135475302noreply@blogger.com0